The paradigm or framework through which we have chosen to view conflict affects how we feel about any particular conflict as well as how we frame or view the conflict itself. This paradigm also controls the concepts and therefore the words we choose to express the conflict. Most often someone who has chosen an adversarial style will speak in terms of positions and outcomes. While another person who has chosen a more collaborative or cooperative style will talk about issues and interests.


Positions

"Almost any event will put on a new face when received with cheerful acceptance." Henry S. Haskins

Someone who has taken a positional attitude often has very firm ideas about how a conflict should be solved. They take the stance that their solution is right and anyone who disagrees with them is wrong. When this is the position taken the next step is to view the other party as the "problem". When both parties react in this manner and both take positions the conflict becomes personalized with each party taking offensive or defensive positions thus creating an adversarial environment.

This makes it very difficult for either party to seriously consider the other's needs or wishes and can lead to a stand-off with the individuals barricaded behind their positions, sniping at each other.


Issues

"Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one's own sunshine." Ralph Waldo Emerson

An alternative to the positional approach is a collaborative or cooperative style where the problem is framed in terms of "what is the problem" rather than who is right or wrong; what needs to be talked about or "what are the differences that we need to discuss" rather than how to force the other to "see it our way". These differences are known as the issues about which the conflict has arisen.

Once a decision is made to explore the issues rather than jumping straight to positions and solutions the opportunity is created to review each individual's interests in the situation.


Interests

"An error is the more dangerous in proportion to the degree of truth which it contains." Henri Frederic Amiel

Once the gaze is directed toward the problem and a discussion of the issues which both parties wish to resolve, and neither party is "the problem" a safer and more productive environment is created. The conflict can then be seen in terms of each person's interests.

The interests are the true matters behind the conflict and are those items upon which positions are often taken. The interests are the very specific reasons behind any position that is taken and are the "real" motivations behind the position. Rather than choosing an outcome (position) the discussion revolves around what the conflict is about (issues) and why each person wants a particular outcome (interests).

This allows for the possibility that a resolution can be reached rather than a settlement being imposed, or acquiesced to and then resented.